보살의 원은 비원(悲源)

2001-06-30 관리자

[보살의 원은 비원(悲願)]

보살의 원은 비원입니다. 슬픈 것입니다. 중생을 바라보는 보살의 마음은 늘 연민의 정이 가득 차, 눈물이 잠시도 마를 날이 없습니다. 왜 보살의 원은 이처럼 슬픈 것일까요?

보현행원품의 항순중생편에는 이런 이야기가 나옵니다. 넓은 사막 한 가운데 나무가 한 그루 서 있는데, 이 나무는 뿌리에서 물을 가득 끌어 올려 삭막한 광야에서 무성한 잎과 열매를 꽃 피웁니다. 생사광야의 보리수왕도 이와 같아서, 중생이 그 뿌리이며 불보살이 그 꽃과 열매인데, 보리수왕은 대비수(大悲水)로 중생을 이익되게 하여(以大悲水饒益衆生) 마침내 불보살이라고 하는 화과가 무성하게 맻히게 됩니다. 또한 보살은 대비심으로 일체 중생을 따르므로 마침내 원만한 중생 공양이 이루어진다고 말씀합니다.

흔히 불교를 자비의 종교라고 합니다. 여기서 '慈'는 남이 잘함을 같이 기뻐하는 것을 말하고,' 悲'는 남이 잘못됨을 안타까와 하는 마음이라고 합니다. 그런데 행원품에서 보는 불보살을 꽃피우는 도구는 '大慈水'가 아니라 '大悲水', 즉 슬픔의 눈물인 것입니다. 눈물은 기뻐도 흐르고 슬프도 흐르는데, 왜 중생을 성숙시키는 것이 기쁨의 눈물이 아니고 슬픔의 눈물이라고 했을까요? 그것은 중생에 대한 사랑을 완벽하게 만드는 것이 바로 '연민의 정'이기 때문입니다.

기쁜 마음도 매우 중요하지만 그것만 가지고 우리의 일체 행은 완전할 수 없습니다. 기뻐하기만 하는 마음은 자칫하면 자만과 아집에 빠지기 쉽게 됩니다. 그것을 막아 주는 것이 바로 연민의 마음입니다.

남을 애틋하고 안타깝게 여기는 그 마음이 있는 한, 우리는 자만과 아집에 머무르기만 할 수는 없습니다. 아무리 재산이 많고 지위가 높으며 아무리 행복하다 해도 우리는 그것을 즐기고 자랑할 수만은 없습니다. 나보다 못한 이들에 대한 끝없는 슬픔은 이태껏 살아온 자신만을 위한 삶을 다시 한번 되돌아 보게 합니다. 이렇게 하여 불완전하고 이기적인 중생의 마음은 보다 높은 단계로 성장되어 가는 것입니다.

보살의 원은 슬픕니다. 이 세상의 바른 모습을 보지 못하고 자꾸만 어둠의 나락으로 떨어져 가는 중생의 그 모습이 슬프고, 그 나락을 막아줄 힘이 자신에게 없는 것이 또한 슬픕니다.

그러나 보살의 슬픔은 슬픔으로만 끝나지는 않습니다. 중생의 그 아픔, 그리고 그 아픔을 그냥 흘러보낼 수 밖에 없는 자신의 무능을 온 가슴으로 뉘우치며, 지금은 내 비록 무능하여 이렇듯 슬픔으로 보낼 수밖에 없으나, 세세영영 중생으로 떠 돌더라도 내 기어코 저 중생을 건지고야 말겠다, 하는 비장한 다짐이 솟게 됩니다. 그리하여 보살은 하늘을 무너뜨릴 것 같은 불같은 정진으로 마침내 깨달음을 이루게 되며, 사바의 중생은 이러한 보살의 원과 함께 종국에는 해탈의 세계로 나아가게 되는 것입니다. 그러므로 일체 중생을 꽃피우는 것은 바로 대비의 눈물, 즉 '大悲水'인 것입니다.

찬란한 햇살이 '慈'라며는, 대지를 촉촉히 적시는 빗물은 바로 '悲'입니다.

광덕 큰스님이 열반하시기 10 여분 전에 눈물을 흘리셨다고 합니다. 저는 아직 견문이 일천해서인지 큰스님들께서 열반하실 때 눈물을 흘리셨다는 말은 들어 본 적이 없습니다. 모든 분들이 생과 사가 둘이 아님을 온 몸으로 보여 주시고 앉아서, 심지어는 거꾸로 서서까지 열반에 드셨지 우시면서 입멸하신 분은 듣지 못했습니다. 그렇다면 큰스님께서는 왜 눈물을 흘리셨을까요?

그것은 바로 보리수왕의 '大悲水'일 것입니다. 그 찬란한 불성을 보지 못하고 오늘도 미망으로 떠도는 일체 중생이 안타까와 흘리신 자비의 눈물일 것입니다. 마치 어린 자녀들을 비바람 거센 세파에 남겨 두고 떠나는 부모님의 마음이 이루 말할수없이 애틋하듯, 아직도 미혹으로 떠도는 저 많은 중생들을 남겨 두고 열반에 들어야 하는 큰스님의 안타까운 마음이대비의 눈물로 현현하셨을 것입니다. 큰스님이 남기고 가신 그 大悲水는, 우리 모두의 가슴에 촉촉히 스며들어 마침내 大悲願으로 자라나 일체 중생의 불성을 꽃 피우고 말 것을 추호도 의심하지 않습니다.

보살의 원은 슬픈 것입니다. 그러나 보살의 슬픔은 슬픔으로 끝나지 않고 기어코 일체 중생을 해탈의 길로 인도할 환희의 눈물이 될지니, 중생이 끝이 없고 중생의 번뇌가 끝이 없으므로 보살의 슬픔도 끝이 없고 원 또한 끝이 없을 것입니다...

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